Surprising Affairs with the Toilet

Recently I have been recalling my incredible history with the toilet. Well, it's actually not the least bit incredible, but I felt so at the time. The time occurred once when I dropped my water bottle in a public restroom toilet, but that is not what I am remembering. No, this was a time far different from any other time. It was not as smashing as having to snatch my mother's glasses from disappearing into the plumbing system, but I was still quite shocked. Now that I have gotten you all excited over nothing, I shall relate my tale.

The event struck two years ago last December, to be quite precise and boring, and it was on the day of the Messiah sing. As a young twelve-year-old, I still had not yet ventured into the women's locker room (partially because I was barely aware of its existence) so therefore I did all my changing in the restroom. As I was doing so a strange thing happened. I could almost play it back again and again in slow motion as I watched my soft, heavy brimmed winter hat roll, roll, roll, off of me and into. . . . . the toilet! And there it lay, floating in good clean toilet water, blissfully unaware of my dumb stare. So stare I did. This was very unexpected, and I was indeed flooded with every emotion of horror and hilarity. Now what? I am not learned in the knowledge of what you should do if you drop something in the toilet, so I was quite speechless and unprepared. I should buy a book, entitled, "What You Should Do When You Drop Your Navy Hat into the Toilet," and while I consult it often, I should buy the other variations for what you do with a red hat, a pink, green, and so forth. Or better yet, I could write my own, because now I figured out what to do.

1. First, with the tips of your thumb and forefingers, carefully pinch the top of the hat that is not touching the water, and lift.

2. After waiting until it stops dripping the good clean toilet water, proceed to the closest coat rack where your coat is kept and gingerly lay it, brim up, on top.

3. Do not forget that it is there and it's condition. When you are ready to return home, promptly hold the hat in the above described position and take home to let you mother plop it in the washing machine. You are now well prepared to face the world.

Of course that is exactly what I did, and now I am quite experienced. Let me know if you need any other tips.;)

Wow I don't know where I come up with such nonsense. . . . .

The Board is Set The Pieces Are Moving

As you may have well been informed, the bibleschool is once again doing a decathlon. That long awaited tradition has been dug out of it's grave to be celebrated and enjoyed by all, despite it's decomposed state. Actually it's only been about five or six years since the last one, but that is a solid space of time in the perspective of such young ones as myself. The main difference for me in this decathlon is that I actually get to be on a team and participate, or try to, instead of gazing wistfully on the side lines. Therefore we have, after much debating and switching around, been made into teams, be they ever so humble. For those of you who care, here is the list of teams as I can recall them. The Joneses: Bethany, TJ, Andy, Sarah Ann, Bria, Katherine, Jayne & Amelia. The Yaw Ruths (inside joke of a spoonerism that was originally the "raw youth"): Sara Lee, Dave, Andrew, Shannon, Megan, Elizabeth, and Laura (?). Finally, the SWAT team (Seven Wonders Always Triumph): Kimberly, Clyde, Adam, Diane, Vanlora, Amy, and ME!!!

Now the activities are: ice hockey, volleyball, sledding, quiz boll, Rook, ping pong, bible memory, snow sculpturing, drama, indoor soccer, and a team dinner. Naturally we are more or less bubbling with excitement as the events are just beginning. Unfortunately my team lost our first quiz boll match, although we were leading for awhile. Also I was a bit annoyed with myself because of my deafness. My dad was asking us what the nickname of Connecticut is. I'm not positive how I managed to be convinced that he asked for the nickname of Kentucky, but I buzzed and cleverly produced the answer with a flourish, and was a bit perplexed when I was wrong. Of course I felt like hitting myself when I found out he really said Connecticut. I must really be deaf.

The other event we have tried is ice hockey. I am very much afraid that I am miserable at it, or I found out that I am as I played my first ever. It's funny how one can enjoy something so much that you're terrible at. I must be talented or something. Maybe.