Your very first history lesson

I don't suppose that you've ever thought about what your first history lesson may have been. What do you suppose it was?

 

You: Um, I don't know. Probably Christopher Columbus or the Pilgrims, I guess.

 

Nope.

 

Normally, I would have given the same answer, but I'll bet you knew some world history even before you learned about Columbus. In fact, I'll bet you knew about King Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette before you had even heard of Christopher Columbus!

 

You: (exclaiming) Good grief, Kayla! I never learned about them until I was in sixth grade at least! (that's when I thought I had learned about them too) And you're telling me I didn't learn about Columbus before then? Good night!

 

Well, actually yes. In fact, I'd even bet that you knew something about them before first grade!

 

You: Um. . . . (while you think about how looney I am)

 

You see it's like this. You may not have necessarily known King Louis XVI's name specifically, and you probably weren't too aware of the somber word "guillotine," but I STILL think you may have known a little something of the story. After all, you don't necessarily have to know the real names in order to know the history, right? So, say we gave King Louis a different name. . . . like Jack, for example. And what if you knew Marie Antoinette by the name of Jill?

 

See where I'm getting at? If you do, you're probably saying

 

You: That's rather far fetched. I'm skeptical.

 

If you don't, then don't worry, because you're about to. So here's something to jog your memory:

 

        Jack and Jill went up a hill to fetch a pail of water,

Jack fell down and broke his crown,

And Jill came tumbling after!

 

Now isn't it crystal clear? Louis went up to the guillotine to "fetch a pail of water," then he "broke his crown" (which is really quite literal when you think about it), and Marie followed suit. Really, I'm not making this up!

 

You: (unconvinced) Sure. . .

 

You see, we tend to think that all nursery rhymes were written for the amusement of children. Actually, that's not wholly true. Back in the Middle Ages it wasn't safe to openly criticize your government, so adults used to amuse themselves by coming up with rhymes to poke fun at different leaders. Soon the adults were also amusing their children by telling them at bedtime, and they were passed on until they became familiar in the way that they are today. This was in my Christian history book (Bob Jones, for the record), and since whatever my history book says is as true as the Gospel, I figure it has to be golden true.

 

Still don't believe me? Maybe you do? Well then maybe you'll enjoy a couple more:

 

Little Miss Muffet

Sat on a tuffet,

Eating her curds and whey;

There came a big spider,

And sat down beside her,

And frightened Miss Muffet away.

 

This one satirizes the relationship between John Knox and Mary Stuart, Queen of Scots (and if you don't know who I'm talking about, then you're probably not a history buff and wouldn't care even if I told you). Mary returned from being raised in France (so I recall) and sat down at the throne of Scotland, enjoying it for a little while. Then along came a "spider" (otherwise known as the fiery John Knox), who condemned her scandalous behavior and Roman Catholic beliefs. So she was supposedly "frightened" away, and she fled to England for protection from her cousin, Elizabeth I.

 

Three blind mice, see how they run!

They all ran after the farmer's wife,

Who cut off their tails with a carving knife,

Did you ever see such a sight in your life,

As three blind mice?

 

In this case, the "farmer's wife" is Mary I, who was Roman Catholic and also became known as "Bloody Mary" (huh, I wonder if bloody wasn't a swear word in England back then). She persecuted the Protestants in England, the most famous of which may have been the three churchmen Cranmer, Ridley, and Latimer, who tried to stop her efforts to reinstate Roman Catholicism in England. Therefore, she "cut off their tails." That is, they were burned at the stake. (and if it is the least bit familiar to you, Latimer is the one who said to Ridley, "We shall this day light such a candle, by God's grace, in England, as I trust shall never be put out." I guess everyone was pretty literal back then)

 

There are more historical rhymes, but I don't remember the stories behind them. Anyway, you get the picture. If you didn't know some of this stuff beforehand, you are now enlightened, but I bet you're pleased to find out that you "knew" more than you realized. You probably had your first history lesson before first grade after all!

 

Now do you believe me?

 

You: I don't know why I ever doubted you!